I am not sure what's happening for you but I've been on a crazy internal and external journey since July.
I've realised the ways I trick myself to be okay with things that just do not feel right. What is the illusion in front of your eyes that you walk through life? What do you hope for?
But if you'd be honest, you'd actually give yourself the advice you'd give your close friend: "Let it go. The reality is different than the hope for what c o u l d be.
It's not an easy process. It feels a bit like dying. Your concepts and ideas of life die. You might disappoint some people and get yourself with an inhale into a very unknown, new and uncomfortable position but as you exhale you also feel more true to yourself, your heart and the truth within.
It's interesting how much we try to make things fit including our thoughts, relationships, people, work, habits, place we live - th